Oh my goodness! I did it!!! I can't believe that I was able to post every single day over the past month. This has been my most prolific month by far, and while not every day was profound, it sure was fun to think of blog topics each day.
Thanks to everyone for joining me for this endeavor, and for being my loyal readers. I am lucky to share the blogosphere with you.
So, who's up for December? I am going to continue posting often, though not necessarily daily :) If you would like to find out more about National Blog Posting Month, please visit www.nablopomo.com.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Ah, my friends, my heart and my tummy hurt today. As I have discussed before, a long-term relationship (4 years) of mine ended in December, 2006. There was a lot that was broken about the relationship, and though it totally demolished me at the time, it was a wise split. I had been living with him, and had to move out quickly. That was what brought me to Jersey City, where I lived for 18 months.
My ex and I gave it another try about 9 months ago - we both felt there was unfinished business, and wondered if we truly were "besheret" - Yiddish for "meant to be." Immediately, the attempt started crushing me again - I started feeling bad about myself, and feeling guilty about my job, my talents, and my personal space. No one has ever made me feel as bad as he does. It was a toxic mix, and I was able to call it quits after a few more months. It provided a great sense of closure for me, and I am grateful that I really got him out of my system.
There was one little hold-over - I still had a few things left at his house. He lives a good 45 minutes away, and I really didn't want to have to take all of that time to go up there and pick up my stuff. Plus, I really didn't want to have to see him again. But, it was time. I had to cut the last cord connecting us.
Lindsay and I drove up to his house today, and I picked up the last remaining items that were the final remains of our life together. I had asked him to put the things on the porch, so that I wouldn't have to see him. Wouldn't you know that he found some reason to come out to "pick up something from his car."
I am furious that he couldn't just let it be, and let me leave. This was the pattern - he never really heard me, or cared about my needs. His needs always trumped mine, which is part of what made me feel so small. Thank goodness Lindsay was with me - she said, sternly, "Okay," which was the signal that everything was in the car and it was time to go.
So, my heart hurts, knowing that it is really final. 99% of me knows that this is such a victory, but 1% is still sad that it didn't work out. At least I am REALLY done with him. There is no reason to have to deal with him again.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
After the recent events in Mumbai, I know that I needed a laugh. Here is one of my most favorite Youtube videos, the Kitty Cat Dance. The main cat looks suspiciously like my calico, Precious (what has she been doing in her free time??). Enjoy :)
Friday, November 28, 2008
As I pause before beginning Shabbat this evening, my thoughts and prayers are with those in Mumbai. My heart is breaking at the thought of all those lives who have been lost, those families who are now forever shattered, those memories forever traumatized.
May those who lost their lives rest in peace. Your memories shall be for a blessing.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Just had to share -
my sister and I were at the "Family Guy Sings!" event a few nights ago. It was taking place at Carnegie Hall, as I mentioned a few posts ago. We were so excited to be there, and, before the show started, we were discussing the irony of such a silly, obscene show holding an event as such a revered concert hall.
My sister then said, "Well, I read an article about the show online, and they said, 'How does one get to Carnegie Hall? Apparently, by creating a hit adult cartoon and staging a live reading of the cartoon.'"
I stopped her.
"I WROTE THAT!" I said. She was quoting me.... to ME! I love it. We got a good laugh about it.
Happy Almost Thanksgiving!!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Hi, folks!! Ready for this week's number? It's a little one, but a loss nonetheless:
- 0.2 lbs
For a total of:
So close to that 12 pound mark!!
So, it would be really easy to be disappointed by this, and, trust me, parts of me want to be upset about the loss. BUT -
- I didn't GAIN any weight this week
- I actually went down, even just a little bit
- As my sister pointed out, it shows that the loss so far isn't a fluke - it is a real weight loss!
- I am still on the right track!!
Wow, I am so excited about this, and how successful it's been so far. Here's to another week!
(and, yes, I know that Thanksgiving is coming up - we'll talk about that eating challenge soon!!)
Monday, November 24, 2008
On the spur of the moment, Lindsay and I went to the TKTS booth in Times Square on Saturday night to see if we could get cheap Broadway tix. I got there first, checked the boards, and noticed that EQUUS was available for 50% off tix! Linds and I had really wanted to see this show, but, due to price and schedules, we had both resigned ourselves to the fact that we weren't going to see it.
Nonetheless - there we were - we got tickets!! We were able to get seats in the fourth row of the Mezzanine, and we knew we were in for a roller coaster of a show. As the website states,
For the first time in over 30 years, a new production of EQUUS will be seen on Broadway after a sold-out run in London’s West End.
Alan Strang (Daniel Radcliffe) seems a normal, obedient 17-year old with a passion for horses. Then one night he blinds six horses with a hoof pick. What drove him to it? His life seems routine, his family loving, his pursuits harmless and yet he has been placed under psychiatric surveillance - an unresponsive patient who is woken each night by terrible nightmares. Only psychiatrist Martin Dysart (Richard Griffiths) seems able to grasp the answer to this psychological puzzle.
Richard Griffiths, whose incredible stage and screen career spans two decades and who won a Tony Award for his performance in the Broadway production of The History Boys, stars alongside Daniel Radcliffe, best known for playing Harry Potter in all five of the feature films based on J.K. Rowling's best-selling books.
This production of Peter Shaffer’s Tony Award-winning play, directed by Thea Sharrock and designed by John Napier, demonstrates that this ground-breaking play is as relevant and shocking as it was when it was first performed over 30 years ago.
It was brilliant, horrifying, moving, and engaging. Since both of us are big fans of psychotherapy and psychoanalysis, we loved the way that Freudian and Jungian ideas flowed throughout the show.
After the show, we decided to stick around at the stage door and try to get Richard Griffiths and Daniel Radcliffe's autographs. We were able to get very close to the barricade set up by security, and we waited in the 20 degree weather.
Then, Richard Griffiths came out (Linds snapped these pics with her cellphone).....
Everyone screamed in excitement (I wonder if Mr. Griffiths has ever felt this much like a rockstar?!?!). Lindsay insisted on engaging him in conversation: "Mr. Griffiths? Mr. Griffiths? Your hat looks very warm!" Griffiths: "It better be." Lindsay: "Is it from Alaska?" Griffiths: "No, it is from Moscow." Lindsay: "Mr. Griffiths, we are of Russian Descent!")
But, that was nothing compared to the excitement of getting Daniel Radcliffe's autograph (Mr. Harry Potter, himself!!!!!!!!!!!). He came over to our area first, and he SIGNED MY PLAYBILL FIRST!!! I got the first autograph of the night. I said, "Daniel, you are wonderful!" (I know, so eloquent....). He looked up into my eyes, with his electric blue eyes, and said in his delicious accent, "Thank you."
Can you tell that we had a great time? We risked frostbite for them, but it was so worth it. Hooray for Broadway!!
What celebrities have you met? Have any fun stories???
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
As many of you know by now, I am originally from Chicago, Illinois. I happen to be a very proud midwesterner, and there is something about the Chicago area that will always feel like my true home, no matter where my life takes me.
I was last home, where my whole family (other than my sister, Lindsay) lives, in August. It is really unfortunate that I can't travel home more than 3 or 4 times a year, but that is just the reality of the situation. My job as a rabbi is such that I work 6 days a week (Thursdays are my precious day off, unless I have a funeral or event), so I can rarely travel on the weekends.
Nonetheless, I have booked my next trip home for the end of December - hooray! My sister won't be able to join me, unfortunately, but both my brothers will also be at my parents' house, so a good time will be had by all who are around (and we will call Linds frequently!!).
And, all of my Chicago friends: let's get together!!! I miss you all so much :)
So, what about you? Where is your family in relation to where you are? Do you live near them? Did you stay where you grew up or did you move away?
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Clapathy: When an audience grows weary of clapping, either at a ceremony or musical performance. "That graduation ceremony was so long, I got clapathetic!" "I was clapping at the beginning of the song, but I quit when I got clapathy."
I just found out about SUCH a fun website: Urban Dictionary. There are all kinds of new, slang terms added by users every day. Some of the amusing finds:
Thumb Strength: The energy required to write a text.
"Forget it, I don't have the thumb strength to text him. Guess I'll just call."
DAM: Stands for Don't Ask Me.
Nerd: How do you factor 3x^7-2(3x-1)^2+...
bearanoia: Bearanoia is a disturbed thought process characterized by excessive anxiety or fear of bears, often to the point of irrationality and delusion. Bearanoid thinking typically includes persecutory beliefs concerning a perceived threat of bears. In the original Greek, (bearnoia) simply means, really fuckin' scared of bears (beara = bears; nous = really fuckin' scared of) and, historically, this characterization was used to describe any delusional state concerning bears.
Stephen Colbert suffers from bearanoia. Timothy Treadwell did not.
What did you find? What would you add?
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Oh my - have you seen this movie?!?!
Every now and then, I like to share some of my favorite pop culture interests (music, movies, books, etc.). One of the movies that I grew up with, and still really LOVE, is Labyrinth.
Made in 1986, it is a wonderful Jim Henson film that combined puppets with human actors. The story is timeless, and the film is so good that it is still enjoyable over twenty years later.
The plot is magical: Sarah, played by Jennifer Connelly, is forced to babysit her little brother (she would rather be playing with her dolls and acting out dramas about the fantastical goblin king). When her brother, Toby, won't stop crying, she wishes that the goblins would come and take Toby away - at that very moment, the room goes silent, and she realizes that her wish has come true.
Sarah then embarks on a journey through a labyrinth, the center of which contains the goblin king's (David Bowie) castle, and her brother. She is given 13 hours to complete the task.
We see so much of what it is like to be a teenager - the angst, the drama, the growing adult feelings, the compassion, and the playfulness. Plus, the soundtrack, featuring many songs written and performed by David Bowie, is superb.
If you have never watched this movie, take some time out to enter a fantasy-land, hear some fun music, and enjoy a wonderful story.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Well, it's 1:00 in the morning, and I am wide awake :)
I worked earlier today, as I mentioned in the last post, and I came home pretty tired. It was a grey, windy day outside, so the most appealing option for the afternoon was a long, cuddling, warm NAP.
I probably fell asleep around 5pm, intending to sleep for an hour or two. When did I wake up?
Almost FIVE hours later. Oy. It was one of those naps where I thought it was the next morning. That's how well-rested I felt.
So, I had dinner, caught up on tonight's episode of True Blood, and now I am wide awake. I wish I didn't have to worry about it, but I have a seminar all day tomorrow, beginning at 8:30 am.
It's one of those weird situations where I got plenty of sleep, and will still sleep some more tonight, but I will feel tired nonetheless tomorrow.
Ah, the perils of napping!!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
One of the benefits of feeling better is that I have much more energy to do the things I haven't been able to do over the past few years. One of these is to attend events of our "Rosh Hodesh" girls' group at the synagogue. We have many different youth groups at our synagogue, but one that really stands out is one that is set aside for Junior High School-aged girls. The program is based on one created by Moving Traditions. According to their website:
Rosh Hodesh: It’s a Girl Thing! is the first proactive, informal education program that uses Judaism to enrich the lives of girls. It draws on Jewish tradition to give girls a place to feel safe, articulate their questions and concerns, have fun, and be ‘real’ with their peers.
Small groups of girls meet monthly with a carefully trained adult leader who uses our step-by-step manual. Through discussion, arts & crafts, and drama, the girls integrate core Jewish values as they focus on the things they care about most, such as body image, friendship, relationships, competition, stress, and family.
We had a program today, held at "Make" - one of those pottery places that allows you to create your own ceramic items. We painted our very own menorahs for the upcoming holiday of Chanukah.
As a young, female rabbi, I really treasure the opportunity to spend time every month with pre-teen girls, and I show them that a woman can do whatever she wants when she grows up. I can chat with the dozen girls who are there, I can be accessible to them, and maybe, just maybe, one of them will want to be a rabbi when she grows up. That would truly be incredible. The feeling of sisterhood, and the sense that I am passing on the tradition, is so special.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Happy Saturday, and Shabbat Shalom!
I am very happy to report that this has been another great week on Jenny. I am in my fourth week on their plan, and it is going so well. It is really set up in an easy way, and it takes a lot of the mental work out of it. As long as you follow what the plan tells you to eat, it is smooth sailing.
Apparently, after this week, I begin planning my own week of meals - they teach me how to build a week, making sure to fit in all of my entrees, fruits, vegetables, snacks, and dairy products. We shall see how that goes on Tuesday, my next weigh-in.
I wonder if I will clear the 10 pound milemarker this week - wouldn't that be amazing! Even if I don't get quite to that point, I am still feeling such a sense of accomplishment - after all these years of weight gain and physical pain, I am feeling GOOD!
By the way, my old high school friend, Julie, at Flip this Body, wondered if I have been exercising at all, in addition to the meal plan. I have definitely been trying! I bought a pedometer, and it appears that I am walking at least 2 miles everyday! Also, I really like the "Exercise TV" channel that you can find On Demand - there are lots of fun options. As my body continues to heal, and as my muscles get stronger and stronger, I am capable of doing more. Currently, I am sticking with some of the "walking" workouts, because I still can't handle a lot of impact (and I am really starting from scratch, in a cardio-vascular sense).
Yay for success!!
Friday, November 14, 2008
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Just bought a new scanner, and made sure to scan some OLD pics of me with friends and family. Enjoy a sampling!
At one of our good friend's weddings, my two best friends from high school, with their husbands.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
As the New York Times itself reported, "Liberal Pranksters" (in the NYT terminology) published a brilliant hoax newspaper this morning. They stood on street corners, near subway entrances, and handed out a "free special edition of the New York Times."
I took one.
As I sat down on the subway, I started reading. Of course, the headline gave me a great start: "Iraq War Ends." Then I looked up at the date - July 4, 2009. Then I looked at the top of the page, where it read, "All the news we hope to print."
Ah, it was pretend. Alas. As I started to read the various stories, I smiled with both joy and sorrow: joy, at the possibility of these stories coming true, and sorrow that they were just mere fiction.
It seems to be the product of a group called the Yes Men. According to Wikipedia,
"The Yes Men are a group of culture jamming
activists who practice what they call "identity correction" by pretending to be
powerful people and spokespersons for prominent organizations. They create and
maintain fake websites similar to ones they want to spoof, and then they accept
invitations received on their websites to appear at conferences, symposia, and
TV shows. Their newfound, self-proclaimed authority to express the idea that
corporations and governmental organizations often act in dehumanizing ways
toward the public has met both positively and negatively with political
overtones. Elaborate props are sometimes part of the ruse, as shown in their
2003 DVD release The Yes Men."
Pretty Cool, Huh? Let me know if you saw it, heard about it, or
what you think!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Sunday, November 9, 2008
I never got to update you on my weigh-in on Tuesday - it was disappointing, which is why I wasn't in a rush to tell you.
Let me first state - I went in during the afternoon this time. Last week, I weighed in FIRST THING in the morning. This week, I had already eaten two meals. Not smart to do it this way. I was up 0.6 lbs during this session, which is probably not accurate. I'll bet, if I had gone in before breakfast, it would have been much more exciting - maybe even two pounds lower?
Well, I keep saying to myself, this week's upcoming weigh-in will be that much better. Right? Tuesday, here I come!
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Oy. Big embarrassing moment last night.
I was leading Shabbat services with the other clergy members, and I was doing a reading before the Mourner's Kaddish (a prayer that we say when we are mourning the loss of a loved one). I didn't pick this particular reading; rather, I was reading it at the suggestion of the senior rabbi. I skimmed it in advance, felt it looked good, and put it on the lectern.
Little did I know, I was stepping into the pits of embarrassment.
I get up there to read it, at this very serious moment in the service, and in the middle of the paragraph is a word I have NEVER seen before:
It swam in front of my eyes. It seemed to be WAY too many syllables. I didn't know what to do.
Mind you, I am a relatively smart gal, I am well read, and I have NEVER had to read this word aloud. I took it one syllable at a time, like a second-grader fumbling her way through a tough vocabulary word.
Ugh. I am never going to get this one wrong again. I now know that it is an adjective, meaning "not eradicable; not capable of being eradicated, rooted out, or completely removed." This makes sense to me. I get it. But I am going to feel embarrassed for quite some time.....
Friday, November 7, 2008
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
Though I am afraid to jinx it, I have had another really good week. Even for the meals that I have had to eat at a restaurant or event, I have been making really good choices.
Why wasn't it this easy before, I wonder? Did I need to take a leap, and perhaps start a new chapter? Did I need permission to focus on myself in this way? Was it important to ask for help and admit that I couldn't do it alone?
I go to my second weigh-in tomorrow (ELECTION DAY!!!!), and I hope that I have good news once again. I am still so scared that there won't be any results, and that I will fail just as I have over the past few years. I hope that this feeling of uncertainty fades away as I feel more and more confident in the process.
I will report back tomorrow!!!!