Sunday, October 14, 2007
A ReAwakening?
Anywho, all the sudden, I have felt a change.
Suddenly, I feel ready to embark on the dating road. I'm not entirely sure what that means, but it is exciting to be entertaining the idea of meeting someone new. Yeah, it's quite a scary proposition (oy, the perils of dating), but I am ready to go back out there. I think that I am THAT MUCH more sure of who I am (though self-awareness is always a work-in-progress), and thus, that much more ready to be myself WITH someone else.
Kinda cool, eh?
Any words of wisdom from all of my blog-friends?
(PS - the art above is by Jan Rae)
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Heads or Tails Tuesday - "Explore"

Well, friends, it is Heads or Tails Tuesday again - hooray! Heads Or Tails is a weekly meme done on Tuesdays. Anyone can play. In fact the more, the merrier! You can visit the Heads or Tails Home Page for more information on how you can join in!
Today's topic is: EXPLORE.....
For some reason, the word "explore" often reminds me of camp. In junior high and high school, I had the privilege of attending a wonderful overnight camp, Olin Sang Ruby Union Institute, (or OSRUI, as we call it). OSRUI is a Reform Jewish overnight camp in Oconomowoc, WI, and I had the opportunity to go for three summers, culminating in a summer-long, intensive Hebrew program that was life-altering.
My summers there were, and still are, precious to me. They really helped further the formation of my identity. Before going to camp, I was stuck in a rut - I had 'skipped' first grade, and had a reputation for being both smart and different. It wasn't that I was nerdy, but I felt boxed in to this one image of who I was. Adjusting to the new social group had been quite challenging when I was so young, and it took a long time to break free from merely being known as "the one who skipped."
So, fast forward to the summer after sixth grade - for the first time, no one knew about my past, and I was able to be whomever I wanted. I EXPLORED many different identities that first summer. I even gave myself a new nickname, Maci (pronounced like the store), in order to EXPLORE what that felt like. Soon, I earned a reputation for being fun, wild, spontaneous, and flirty (I had THREE boyfriends in THREE weeks that year!!). What a difference! Luckily, I was able to bring some of that newfound confidence back home with me, and integrate it into my school life. I was never the same, and longed for the next opportunity to go back to camp. I returned the following summer, and then the summer before 10th grade.
For those of you who have attended overnight camp, you know how intense those friendships can be. I am still friends with a number of my camp friends, and I treasure those summers. Additionally, I credit OSRUI with being part of my inspiration to become a rabbi. Those summers instilled in me a deeper love for Judaism than I probably would have had with synagogue life alone. Perhaps I am a rabbi just so that I can recreate those camp experiences for others!
Monday, October 8, 2007
Curious as a Cat - a Monday Meme
Here is a Monday Meme from Curious as a Cat - it always asks interesting and provocative questions. I missed last week's, and it had a question that I really wanted to answer, so I am going to break with protocol and do last week's questions instead of this week's.
1) If you could have eased the death of one person, whose would it have been?
Oh, Todd, I wish I could have been there to help you. Todd was one of my best friends for nearly my entire life. We knew each other from elementary school on, and I always felt a deep love and affection for him. Even if we would lose touch over the years, any time we would reconnect, it would feel as if no time had passed. [His anniversary of death is coming up in a few weeks, and I will tell you more about him then]. To make a very long story short, he was found dead on the air force base he was stationed at in Korea. The military has never determined the cause of death - not even whether it was accidental or if foul play was involved. I just wish I could've been there to stop it all from happening... or even to be there with him so he didn't have to die alone.
2) What value do you consider most important when choosing a friend?
I've never really thought about this one in quite this way. What value? Probably involvement in what we call in Hebrew tikkun olam - a need to repair the broken world around us. I respect people who care about the world, who care about other human beings, and who want to make the world a better place by seeking to end suffering and injustice. ... that and a really big appreciation for potty humor :)
3) If the U.S. had to give up one state, which one would you pick? Why?
Um, well, I hope not to offend anyone.... But, I would probably pick Wyoming - I just don't know anything about it. So, purely selfishly, I would just get rid of it. Actually, it reminds me of an old television cartoon version of "Garfield," in which he jokingly explained that, "Wyoming translates to, 'No State Here.'"
4) When (at what age, or during what event) did you have the least self-confidence?
Following my car accident nearly three years ago, I developed pretty severe anxiety and panic. Thank goodness, over the years, it has gotten much better. However, my self-confidence drops and my self-consciousness rises the more anxious I get. Especially as I get close to a panic attack, I tend to get really unsure of myself. I am sure that it goes hand in hand with the feelings of anxiety and unsteadiness.
5) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.
I get the warmest feeling when I look at this - as if we are all going to gather in front of the fireplace with warm apple cider and cookies. We will listen to stories about fantastic lands, incredible feats of bravery, and romantic tales of love conquering all. We hear the fire crackling, smell the cinnamon and cloves, cuddle together under blankets, and smile at each other. What a peaceful moment!
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Karaoke Craziness!
Ahhhhh - I feel so satisfied. Last night, Lindsay (my sister) and I decided to try out a bar in our area that was offering karaoke. When we used to live in NYC, we would go all the time. However, since moving to New Jersey, we hadn't yet tried out any bars in our new neighborhood. A great "K.J." was there (Karaoke Jockey) from Evil John Karaoke. Thanks, John, for being so much fun, and letting us sing so much!
It took a while to get familiar with being up there, with moving my body, with performing in general. I hadn't been to karaoke in about six months - I used to go at least once a week while I was in graduate school! Because of my back pain, I rarely dance or move in any way other than walking. Though I am paying for it a little today, I am so glad that I danced and had fun last night.
I sang, "We Belong," by Pat Benatar; "Criminal," by Fiona Apple; "I Touch Myself," by the Divinyls (teehee!); and, "Out Tonight," from Rent.
Lindsay and I also did a duet: "I Know Him So Well," from Chess. She sang a bunch of songs, and we had such a good time. The bar wasn't too crowded, and there weren't that many people singing - hence the great number of songs that we were able to perform.
Hoooray for karaoke! I can't wait to go again!
So, what songs do you like to do/would you sing if you could? Even if you've never been to karaoke - what would be your first choice?
Friday, October 5, 2007
Movie Quotes Answers!

Wow, I am so impressed with all of you! It seems like a bunch of you knew all five answers. Kudos to Lindsay, Jessica and Sarene, who came in with the best scores, from what I can tell. However, you all get points for playing - thanks!
And the answers are...
1) "And in the morning? I'm making waffles!"
This one is from SHREK - a movie that never stops making me laugh :)
2) "I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen."
Ah, SAY ANYTHING. What would Junior High and High School have been like if I hadn't always been on the lookout for my very own Lloyd Dobler? In fact, I think I am still looking...
3) "The Pit of Despair- don't even think of trying to escape."
Teehee - a quote from THE PRINCESS BRIDE. Another standard among my friends and me as we grew up. I probably quote this movie in some way at least once a day.
4) "I felt like destroying something beautiful."
A movie that totally blew my mind while in my early 20's - FIGHT CLUB. It had a raw quality, and a deep sorrow, that resonated with me at a particular time in my life. Never mind the fact that I have a huge crush on Edward Norton!
5) "Every time I try to talk to someone, it's always 'Sorry this' and 'Forgive me that' and 'I'm not worthy'..."
What would comedy be like without MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL? Another one that I quote often, this film gets funnier every time I watch it. Seeing SPAMALOT on Broadway just took the genius to a whole new level.
Well, thanks to all of you for playing. I hope this was fun for you. Should I do it again? Maybe once every other week or so? I might even vary the topic - movie quotes, song lyrics, television characters, showtunes... Ah, the possibilities are endless.

