Hi, everybody! I hope you are all having a good weekend, and finding the rest and relaxation that you deserve.
I find myself feeling more and more nervous, understandably, as I get closer to my back surgery. My operation in on this coming Wednesday, so I have three days left of whatever my life is now. I can't yet know what the days, weeks, months will be like immediately following my surgery, but I certainly think a little bit farther into the future...
I can't wait to finally feel better. I can't even imagine what it will be like to live without constant pain nagging at my consciousness. To walk without feeling like I need to find a seat. To do chores around the house without groaning from the growing burning in my back. Wow - that would be amazing.
And yet, even with the hope, I am really pretty scared about the whole thing. I keep doubting myself: maybe my pain is not SO bad, and maybe I can just live with it. But, I know that's the fear talking. I have fought so long and hard to feel better, and maybe, just maybe, the turning point has come.
So, I hope to post over the coming days (God knows I am going to need it), and then I will be sure to post as soon as possible, after the operation, to update you all on how I am feeling. I had a dream the other night that I woke up, right after the operation, as the anesthesia was fading, and I could already feel better.
Maybe it is prophetic?
Have you ever had a dream actually come true?
Saturday, December 15, 2007
at 5:03 PM