Why I Officate at Interfaith Weddings

Why - and How - I Officiate

My latest from the Jewish Week. Why do I, as a Reform rabbi, officiate at certain interfaith wedding ceremonies? Read to find out!

How does being a Trekkie inform my rabbinate?

Go (Boldly) to Shul, Urges a Trekkie!

My husband and I attend the Star Trek Convention, and I learn lessons about synagogue life that I didn't expect. Read on to learn more!

Technology and Judaism

How Technology Enriches Jewish Lives

What have I observed about the ways in which technology can enhance and benefit us in our Jewish lives?

The Lesson's of Lot's Wife

The Lessons of Lot's Wife

How should we act when we stand at the crossroads? Do we look back or move forward?

Days are Scrolls

Days are Scrolls. 

Write on them what you want to be remembered.What do you write on your scrolls?

How Do We Pray 100 Times a Day?

How to Pray 100 Blessings a Day?

How do we practice true gratitude and offer 100 blessings each day?

Help Preserve Religious Freedom in Israel - URGENT!!

This past Monday, the Constitution, Law, and Justice Committee of the Knesset, Israel's Parliament, passed, by only one vote, a bill which would give the Chief Rabbinate of Israel sole authority in the area of conversions in Israel. If this bill passes the Knesset, then all conversions held by progressive (Reform, Conservative, and Reconstuctionist) rabbis in and out of Israel will be called into questions, if not entirely negated. Please read the following letter, from Rabbi Eric Yoffie (President of the Union for Reform Judaism) and ACT NOW!!!

Dear Friend,

Emergency is not too strong a word. This week, despite commitments to the contrary, the Israeli Knesset is considering legislation that would fundamentally change the Law of Conversion and further concentrate power with the Chief Rabbinate. The bill would give the Chief Rabbinate exclusive oversight of all conversion matters, putting non-Orthodox conversions performed abroad at risk, and greatly limiting the options available to Israelis and olim (immigrants to Israel) wishing to convert or in need of ‘official’ recognition. Sadly, this happened within hours of the arrest of Anat Hoffman (Director of the Israel Religious Action Center and Founder of Women of the Wall) for praying at the Western Wall with a Torah scroll, yet another reminder that non-Orthodox Jews don’t enjoy the same religious freedom in Israel that we do in North America.

It is critical that Prime Minister Netanyahu hear a loud and clear message from Diaspora Jewry that further alienation of non-Orthodox Jews goes against our deeply held beliefs in Klal Yisrael and creates a dangerous rift between Israel and world Jewry at a time when the relationship between North America and Israel is so vital. We urge you to contact the Prime Minister as soon as possible and share your concern over the future of religious freedom in Israel, the character of the Jewish State, and the relationship between Israel and the Diaspora.

The Union for Reform Judaism, along with our Reform counterparts in Israel and affiliates around the world, will be closely monitoring the legislation over the next few days. We are prepared to take any action at our disposal necessary to prevent passage of this bill. We’ve dispatched senior members of the Union’s staff to join with Rabbi Daniel Allen, ARZA Executive Director, in Israel to personally meet with members of the Knesset and convey to them the significance of this matter. At the same time, our Israeli and international Reform communities are mobilizing as well to convey their concern.

Your email and support are essential to our success. For more information on this issue you can visit http://urj.org/israel/rotem. We hope you will join us in this cause.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Eric Yoffie Peter Weidhorn
President Chairman of the Board

Contact Prime Minister Netanyahu Today!

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Shalom, friends!

It's been a busy year, as I am sure you can tell by my less-than-frequent blogging. I would love to be blogging more, but free time has been minimal.

Rabbi-life: I am loving my first year as the rabbi at a wonderful congregation in Wantagh, New York. The congregants are terrific, the area is lovely, and the job is fulfilling. I feel supported by family and friends, and I am blessed by a strong, competent lay leadership at the temple. I've learned so much so far about leading a congregation. There have been plenty of challenges (oy!), but also plenty of successes. I love it there!

Jenny Craig: Those of you who were following my Jenny Craig posts may want an update in that area. I stopped doing Jenny Craig last summer when I began my new job. My psyche is such that I can only handle (as I am sure is true for many of you) so many stressors at once. I just didn't have the brain power to continue at that time, and I was feeling burnt out after 8 months of participation. I have high hopes of continuing again soon.

Wantagh: The weaning process is nearly complete - I will be officially living the confines of NYC in one month. I am finally moving out to Long Island. I have found an amazing townhouse (with an outdoor pool, fitness center, tennis courts) and I can't wait to begin this new chapter. Packing over the next month will be CRAZY, but there are good things on the other end. I will be walking distance from the temple, so I hope to walk often!

Karaoke: I have the coolest congregants! Many of them LOVE karaoke, so we have lots of fun singing together. I just have to explore the karaoke joints in and around Wantagh. If you know of one, let me know! There is much singing to be done!

Cats: Lindsay and I adopted a new baby kitten!! He is so cute, and you must check out this video of him when he was still a stray at the vet.



He was named "Magellan" then, but now we have decided to call him "Snickerdoodle." That being said, we call him "Baby Boy" more than anything else. :) Precious and Caramel are adjusting to their new friend.

Well, I hope you have good things in your lives, and that you are happy and healthy.

Tweet the Exodus!!!

Happy Rosh Chodesh Nisan!!

In honor of the beginning the Hebrew month in which we celebrate the wonderful holiday of Pesach, something AMAZING is happening on Twitter. For the first time ever, a group of rabbis and educators from all over the country (including moi!) will be tweeting the story of the Israelites' Exodus from Egypt.

This will be a huge multimedia experience, and I strongly encourage you to check it out.

To join in the fun, please visit TweettheExodus on Twitter!!

The Actor's Nightmare - Rabbi Style

Are you familiar with the phenomenon of the "Actor's Nightmare?" It is a dream that many, many people in the performing arts have at some point, in some way, shape or form. Typically, in this dream, you find yourself about to go on stage for a performance for which you are completely unprepared. There is a deep sense of anxiety that corresponds with this dream, a lack of control, and a general "sucky" feeling.

I have had a variation of this dream, on and off, for my entire life.

Well, folks, I had a RABBI version of the dream a few nights ago!

I dreamt that was almost ready to go out onto the bimah (the "stage" in a sanctuary) when I realized, in a total panic, that I had forgotten to prepare for both a baby naming and a wedding blessing. I didn't have the materials with me, I hadn't created the requisite certificates, and I didn't even know their names!

I told the cantor to go ahead and start without me, while I scrambled up and down stairs, down long hallways, and through my files, looking for all the info. Of course, at some point, I lost my glasses, so I couldn't see while having to do all of this.

I made it back to the bimah, with all the paperwork, only to find that I had missed the entire service. The cantor was finishing up, and everyone was on their way out.

I found the baby naming family in the lobby, apologized profusely, tried to fudge my way through something resembling a blessing, and gave them a hastily prepared certificate. Bleh!

You can only guess how I felt as I woke up....

Have you ever had one of these?!??!

Reflecting on the past decade....

Last night, as we approached midnight, Lindsay and I were reminiscing about where we were 10 years ago. The year 2000 was upon us, and we were in Jerusalem.

I was in my first year of rabbinical school at HUC-JIR, on the Jerusalem campus. I lived there for one year, and Lindsay was kind enough to come out for a visit over winter break. We were so afraid that either, a) the world would end (Y2K, etc) as midnight approached, or b) some crazy group would decide to decimate Jerusalem. Thus, my class chose to celebrate the new year at school, a few yards from a bomb shelter. We were overlooking the Jaffa Gate to the Old City, and we watched as Christian pilgrims carried torches into the gated city. It was majestic, awe-inspiring, and even a little terrifying.

Nothing happened, of course, but there was nowhere else I wanted to be as the new decade began (and, yes, I know that, technically the decade began in 2001, but no one seems to count that way).

What an amazing way to enter the new decade.

Here are some highlights of the decade in my life:

1. Moved to New York for the duration of rabbinical school in August, 2000.
2. Ended the engagement to my college fiance, started to figure out who I truly was for the first time - Fall, 2000
   
3. Appeared on the short-lived Oxygen Network game show, "Trackers," and won! (a karaoke machine, naturally!!) - Fall, 2000
4. Adopted my calico, Precious, in January, 2001
5. Developed a long-standing passion for KARAOKE!
   
6. Began a two-year student pulpit in Brandon, FL at Congregation Beth Shalom - learned so much about being a rabbi - 2001-2003
7. Lindsay moved to NYC, and in with me, in 2002
   
8. Was in a longterm relationship from 2003-2007
9. Ordained as a rabbi in 2004
10. Worked at an amazing NYC congregation for five years (2004-2009)
11. Started THIS BLOG in February, 2007!
    
12. Underwent successful spinal fusion surgery in December, 2007
13. Joined the Temple B'nai Torah family in Wantagh as their rabbi this past summer.

So much to celebrate - and these are just a few of the highlights. Wishing you all a blessed 2010 filled with light, joy, and love. Here's to another terrific year!!

The Miracle of Karaoke

So, you know that I am, and have been for some time, a karaoke addict. During rabbinical school, I would often go out for karaoke at least twice a week, and I became good friends with the DJ and other regulars. It was a huge part of my life for years. Now, I still try to go every few months.

However, last night, I witnessed the MIRACLE OF KARAOKE!!

What miracle? Well, I had dinner at a congregant families' home, and it turns out that the husband and wife met at a karaoke bar. They told me the story of how she sang, "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy," and how he was totally smitten from that moment on.

At that point, their son called out: "I wouldn't be here if it weren't for karaoke!"

Yes, folks, karaoke can truly be a miracle, and can bring about life. No, really!

After dinner, we all sat around and sang some karaoke songs ("Torn," "I Gotta Feeling," "I Feel Fine," "Crazy," "Before He Cheats," and more).

Now, I believe in the power of karaoke even more than before. Hallelujah!

Girls on Pop: Everyone Loves a Rabbi

One of my bestest friends, Brooke Tarnoff, is a writer of PopEater, a really fun AOL pop culture website. (Brooke and I were partners-in-crime in college, and we wrote some of the best sketch comedy in the history of the world. Really.) She makes these fabulous podcasts with a group of cool gals who talk all things pop. In the latest episode, Brooke name-drops me throughout! The title, "Everyone loves a rabbi," refers partly to me! Apparently, I need to be giving out "Rabbi Relationship Advice." Crazy!! Check out the video below (I get mentioned around the 15:00 mark).

As the Interfaith World Turns....

As part of my new position here in Wantagh, I have had a new, wonderful opportunity to be a part of two local interfaith clergy councils: Massapequa, the location of one of our merged congregations, and Wantagh.

In my previous five years as a rabbi, I hadn't yet had a chance to do much interfaith work. It's not that I wasn't interested; rather, the learning curve of entering the rabbinate was so steep that there was only so much I felt I could do.

Now, as a solo rabbi in a smaller community, I can really get to know the other clergy in the area. And, boy, are they wonderful!! I have already enjoyed meeting other people of faith, who are so dedicated to their religious communities, to helping people on their spiritual quests, and to appreciating a sense of the divine in our lives. The group serves as an important reminder of all that we have in COMMON, rather than the differences that may divide us.

I had lunch yesterday with the current president of the Wantagh Clergy Council, Father Christopher Hofer, who seems to be a clergy person with a very similar M.O.: bringing joy and love back to our religious experiences. Feel free to check out his terrific blog and learn more about him and his community, The Church of St. Jude (Episcopal).

We have a big Interfaith Thanksgiving Service coming up, on Wednesday night, November 22. Our synagogue is hosting this year, and it promises to be a huge event of music, togetherness, and gratitude. I'll let you know how it goes!

Chag Sukkot Sameach! Happy Sukkot!

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the temple....

We have another holiday right around the corner! Welcome to the festive holiday of Sukkot. During Sukkot, Jews build booths, or huts, called Sukkot (singular = Sukkah). We are commanded to dwell in them during the seven days of the festival (please note that Conservative and Orthodox Jews observe eight days of the festival). If the weather is good, we are encouraged to sleep, eat, study, and do all of our general, daily activities in the Sukkah.

The Sukkot remind us of our days when we were farmers, and we would have to dwell in temporary shelters along our fields at night. These huts keep us closer to the earth and the heavens above. The roof, covered by branches and leaves, is left open to the sky so that we can see the moon and stars at night.

During this festival, we shake a lulav and an etrog - made up of four species of plants that grow in Israel: Citron, Myrtle, Willow, and Palm. We shake the lulav and the etrog in E, S, W, N and up and down, symbolizing that God is all around us.

This harvest festival is a wonderful way to reconnect with the the beautiful, natural world around us. We watch the leaves starting to change colors, the weather is growing colder, and we are getting ready to hibernate for the winter. But, our tradition helps us spend time outside, out in the world, breathing the fresh air and watching the beauty around us.

Chag Sameach - Happy Holidays!!

L'shanah tovah!! Happy New Year!!!

Hello, friends! I hope you are all having a lovely autumn. For those of us Jews, we have been in the midst of the Yamim Noraim, the Days of Awe. These are the ten days that begin with Rosh HaShanah (the Jewish New Year) and conclude, tonight and tomorrow, with Yom Kippur (the Day of Repentance).

This is a time of reflection, contemplation, and reconnection. We are encouraged to return to our true selves - to consider our behavior over the past year and seek to do better in the coming year. We listen to the Shofar blast - the loud sound that comes from a ram's horn. It serves as a wakeup call, forcing us to reach for our highest potential as human and spiritual beings.

I hope that you all have a good and healthy 5770, and that you always feel that you can have a fresh start whenever you most need one.

For a truly new, innovative way of thinking about these ten days, please visit 10Q - they have created meaningful questions, for Jews and non-Jews alike, to contemplate over the past few days. You have the next 72 hours to complete the questions (and they remain confidential). One year from now, they will email you your answers, giving you an opportunity to see how you did this year!

L'shanah tovah tikateivu v'tichateimu - May we all be inscribed and sealed in the Book of Life for the coming year!

A New Synagogue Home!

So excited to be the new rabbi at a wonderful congregation on Long Island (YES, I finally have my own parking space!!! The ultimate luxury!!).

The congregants have been so warm, so welcoming, and have really opened their hearts and souls to me so far. I began last Wednesday, July 1, and I've been slowly becoming more and more acclimated. Friday night was my very first Shabbat worship service with the community, and I am STILL enjoying it. I felt like I ran a marathon, but it was such an amazing feeling - so much love, spirit, and joy. Though the new cantor doesn't officially begin until August, he was our "special guest," and it was just amazing to see how fun it will be leading services with him all the time.

I can't even begin to convey how thrilled I am to be a part of this new congregation. It is a very exciting time for all of us in the community, as we glimpse the exciting possibilities in our collective future.

Hope all is well with you!!

Chag Shavuot Sameach - Happy Shavuot!!

Wishing you all a Chag Shavuot Sameach - a Happy Shavuot.

Shavuot (meaning "weeks") is the Jewish holiday that celebrates the giving and receiving of Torah - the Five Books of Moses - on Mount Sinai. Why "weeks?" Shavuot falls on the day following the counting of 7 weeks (a week of weeks) since Passover.

So, theoretically, the Israelites were freed from slavery in Egypt 50 days ago, and they have been on a journey all this time towards the foot of Mount Sinai. These have been their first tastes of freedom in 400 years, and I would imagine that they were scared, elated, confused, and traumatized. Now, they stand as a community and as a new people,below the mountain, and Moses has ascended to receive Torah.

In these few weeks, we move between two of God's greatest acts: the redemption from slavery, and now the revelation at Sinai.

I will be attempting an all-night study session tonight - there is a tradition of "Tikkun Layl Shavuot," in which Jews study texts and learn together all night, until sunrise. I will be attending a terrific session at the local JCC, which is offering study, dance, meditation, learning, and plenty of food and coffee.

Wishing you meaningful moments of learning and revelation in your own lives!

I am decathecting.....

de•ca•thect

Pronunciation: (dē"ku-thekt'), [key]
—v.t.
to withdraw one's feelings of attachment from (a person, idea, or object), as in anticipation of a future loss: He decathected from her in order to cope with her impending death.

Random House Unabridged Dictionary, Copyright © 1997, by Random House, Inc., on Infoplease.

Yep, it appears that I am beginning to decathect from my current job. I described it as "senioritis," but then I learned that there is a psychological term for it: to decathect. These have been a really tough few weeks, especially since we held my big "Farewell Shabbat Service" over a week ago. So, like, the congregation said goodbye to me, but I still have a month left before I actually go.

In addition, I am so excited, and so ready, to begin my new position in Wantagh. So many meetings have already taken place, and there are so many wonderful things to come. It is hard to be in this state of limbo - between one place and another. A transitional space, like the Israelites wandering b'midbar - in the wilderness. There is much uncertainty, much mourning for the job that I am leaving, but also much anticipation for the new chapter that is beginning shortly.

So, I am just trying, REALLY hard, to be where I am. To just appreciate the journey, even though it is a long, drawn-out goodbye. I want to appreciate all that this particular synagogue has meant to me, personally and professionally, before I rush to move over to the new one.

Any suggestions?

Support Gay Marriage!! Get a Free Sticker!!

After a lot of years of devastating setbacks in the fight for marriage equality, it seems like the country is finally moving in the right direction. With marriage legal in Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont and Maine, and the fights going strong in New Hampshire, New York and California, this movement is gaining more momentum every day, and I'm excited, as a woman, a heterosexual, a Jew, and a rabbi, to be a part of it. It is up to each and every one of us to stand up for equality for all!

To that end, I wanted to let you know that CREDO Action is giving away some awesome stickers about supporting gay marriage - I think you'd really like them. I just got mine - if you have a minute, click this link to check out the stickers and get one of your own (for free!).

https://act.credoaction.com/stickers/?r_by=-2018050-FoY7Q9x&rc=fb.connect&sp=i_love_love

Thanks!